Homesick

Today was an Ethan day. I don't know why but for some reason he was on my mind all day. I didn't have to work today. We went to a Lollipops concert at 9:30 - Grand Rapids Symphony does a 45 minute show for young children - and then no school. For some reason I slept until 8:30 and then jumped out of bed to shower and get to the concert.
Thoughts of him raced through my mind. It started last week with an innocent post card from a driver's education company who got a list with Ethan as a potential student, and then a letter from our auto insurance making certain that we insure anyone in our household who is old enough to drive. He's not here, I said out loud. Then I whispered...he's not here.
So after the concert I came home and got some work done and then headed over to the mall to purchase a book. In the bookstore, I could hear Ethan prompting me and then when I was walking through the mall, I heard a mom calling to her child..."Ethan...come here..." I know; it's a pretty common name...but wow after the day I had had...
Then Bible study...the songs were The Old Rugged Cross and At The Cross... I prayed that I wouldn't cry. We got up to get our dinner and someone came over to tell me they had thought about Ethan at the Betty White show when a child with cancer was on the stage with her and hugging her.
Today, I wanted to be in Heaven. Today, I wanted to hug my youngest son. Today, I love my Savior and pray for His return so I can live as God intended...without sorrow, without anxiety, without pain.
I will patiently await my call home...today I was homesick.